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Thursday, April 19, 2012
Top tips for dating a Firefighter cont.
The fire
station is still going to be the richest environment to find your guy, but
maybe the damsel in distress isn’t your way. What other strategy might you
employ?
Do you have
a kid or one you can borrow for an afternoon? When I say kid you need one of
the appropriate age, too young and your cover story will be obvious, babies
aren’t fascinated with all things fireman. Too old and you run the risk of your
sister’s disenfranchised teenage son busting you on your quest to land a
fireman.
Pick a kid
any kid, doesn’t matter the sex, little girls can grow up to be miserable, insufferable,
unsatisfied employees just like the guys too. Now the set up is going to be
critical, this kid is going to require sufficient post firehouse bribes to not
blow your cover.
Make it a good
reward you want to keep your coconspirator on task. I have seen a woman turn a
brighter shade of firetruck red when her innocent assistant blurted out “Which
fireman are you picking Aunt Betty? I wanna go get my ice cream now.”
With a well
coached kid in place select your fire station; you should have already
preplanned this visit so that you know you are entering a target rich
environment. You haven’t preplanned yet you say? Okay let’s cover that.
Preplanning
is going to be essential; you don’t want to walk into a firehouse full of old
married dudes, or worse yet one with a few women on the crew. Total waste of
time, you need to find one with higher odds of single young aggressive alpha males,
and where are these?
They are
going to be first and foremost a multiple company station, a station with at
least two companies residing there, more if you are lucky. Why? Simple more
BRTs equal more men.
Just keep
your eyes open as you travel your community. Best time to go on an expedition
is going to be mid morning on warm days. First, the big garage doors are opened
most mornings to air out the station before it gets too warm. Secondly on nice
days rolling the trucks outside is just a more pleasant time to do our checks
and wash the BRTs.
Keep your
eyes open for likely candidates. If you are lucky there might be an inconspicuous
business within viewing distance a 7-11 or a Starbucks perhaps, pull in and
take a minute to observe your quarry. At this point my advice may sound a bit
stalkery and to be truthful it is.
You want
one of these guys I don’t, I’m just giving you my best advice on how to get
one, and you won’t be the first to try this, I’m not inventing what I’m telling
you, I’m sharing proven tactics confessed from the very mouths of successful fireman
hunters.
Many of
these women (the ones without restraining orders on them) are now proud owners
of their very own firefighter. I have heard their confessions voiced while
under the influence and in the company of other bragging owners. They tell how
easy it was to capture the attention of their intended victim, child’s play they
say.
That’s good
news if you think about it and I want you to be encouraged here, don’t be a scaredy
cat. Lesser women than you have lead successful hunts.
Once you
have located what looks to be a target rich environment deploy the kid. The best
times for your excursion are going to be after lunch or dinner as most officers
allow some downtime following meals and they guys likely won’t be engaged in
training or some other distraction. Weekends are also a good time as a more
casual work place is allowed on these days.
Just ring
the doorbell and wait. Ringing the doorbell will bring nearly the entire crew
to the door. This is because people often walk or drive to the fire station with
emergencies for some reason and we never now.
Secondly the
whole crew shows up because there might be a hot chick at the door, truth. You will
know if you are considered a hot chick by the number of men that stay to
interact with you. If most wander away, that is a good thing. The unavailable
and older men aren’t going to be bothered with a tour for some kid.
The single,
cheery, and interested men will be overly happy to show off their stuff for the
kid. Understand there will be an immediate assessment of your availability. Is she
wearing a ring? Is this your child if so why didn’t daddy come along?
This isn’t
the first time this will have happened at the station. We have seen it before
and we Know what is happening if you
are single and that’s okay we welcome it, and know this, the majority of the
time your actions will be viewed as a compliment and you will be safe with
these men, nothing will happen if you don’t want it to.
The child
will have a memorable day and get to do a bunch of stuff ever kids should get
to do. We love being heroes for kids it is the best part of the job, and showing
off for an attractive female, well that goes without saying.
You are in.
Now any further action will be squarely in your court. If you have found a
suitable candidate that you would like to test drive, you know what to do,
unless you have no skills as a woman, and if that be the case, you have no
business trying to land one of these beasts. Get out while you can.
I can
assure that in the confines of the fire station you will encounter nothing but
gentlemen. Once outside the red brick walls I will offer no guarantee.
More to
follow on Friday. Cheers.
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
How do you find that Firefighter to date?
It has been
mentioned to me that I haven’t told you where to find your firefighter, good
point, you have to find one to date one, so here are some tips on where the
best hunting is.
The most
obvious is of course the firehouse its’ self that is after all where your allusive
prey lives. But how do you make an approach short of an actual emergency? This one
is very simple and I will take through some real world experiences I
participated in or observed first hand.
First off
you can be either random or pre planned. I’ll use a shopping analogy to be more
helpful as I believe shopping is something women are already good at naturally.
You can
impulse shop, just literally go to any random store (read fire station) and see
what is on sale that day, you don’t need any real clear idea of what you are
after. You aren’t shopping for to use a Sex in the City reference "Manolo
Blahnik" shoes. You are just shopping.
Now in
retail salespeople are going to be happy to see you just walk in the door. At the
fire station if you are an eligible woman (or for that matter any citizen we
are by nature helpful people) and you show up we are going to try and discover
what your need is and how we can help.
Here is your cover story, you need directions to
someplace. Think about it for a moment, who knows the streets better than
firefighters and we have maps. Do a little research; either go big or small but
not common in your request.
For example don’t ask about an easy obvious street,
you will immediately be perceived as a bubblehead. But do ask for say a short
cut to the nearest highway or if you know an obscure little street ask about
that. We won’t find fault in that request and many options will be suggested.
Pay attention to who is helping you, if you present
yourself in just a tiny bit of sexy apparel and a splash of perfume the single
alphas will present themselves. The married will as well but they will defer to
the single guys (unless they are one of those guys and you don’t want them
anyway) and be helpful but not aggressive.
Don’t use the absence of a wedding ring here as an
indicator of material status, many guys don’t wear their bands at work as they
tend to get hung up on stuff and rip your finger off.
You will have the full attention of the entire crew.
Now shop. Is there anything you want to try on? Do you see anything in your
size? If the answer is yes you know what to do. Show the salesman some interest
in the product.
Remember these guys are working at a base level their
senses at work are elevated, they’ll be cooperative. You may get an offer on a
sale price right then. Here is a simple leave behind it’s called in sales. Ask this
question of the man you want more interaction with.
“If I get lost can I call you guys for more help?”
Being the helpful lads they are you will see a
flurry of pens removed from pockets. Now you have to decide at this point how
much of a damsel in distress do you want to be? There is fine line between
bubblehead and innocent. Don’t get me wrong some of these guys are only
qualified for bubbleheads, after all they do run into burning buildings for a
living, how sharp can they be?
So if you want to go bubblehead you can offer your
phone number just in case you get cut off during a follow-up call. Because as
soon as you are gone there will be an extensive discussion as to why you
provided your number and who you gave it to.
They may run into burning buildings but they aren’t
stupid and collectively they will come to the idea the number was left behind
for the very purpose we are discussing here, you want a call from that guy. They’ll
get there.
He’ll call you to see if you made it successfully to
your destination. So take it from there he is on the hook.
But maybe you don’t want to be that overt, you aren’t
comfortable with that much exposure. So just get the number to the station for
your preplanned follow-up call, pay attention to the name tags, you want to
either have “him” answer the phone or be able to request him by name when you
call back.
Don’t worry about asking for him by name. First the
guy answering the phone has no clue who you are when you call, second the guy
you are asking for was more than likely the most helpful at the beginning. If he
wasn’t, when you get him on the phone he isn’t going to ask you why you asked
for him, he is going to get it, and if he does, just say his name was the only
one you remembered.
Now it’s up to you, if interested he will do his
part just lead him a little bit. If he isn’t interested you will know that as
well, he won’t be rude, but he will be matter of fact and offer as little
conversation as possible. Now let it go so you can prepare for your next move.
Your guy may be a bit slow out of the gates and lack
the confidence to continue the hunt. Here is a simple follow-up, you need to
know what shift he is on, just ask, say you want to tell the chief how
impressed you were with how helpful his guys were, and you want to show your
appreciation.
Next time his crew is on duty drop in and bring some
cookies or some sweet to them. Another tip here, if you are a health nut about
the way you eat and diet now is not a good time to show that. Don’t bring these
men a low-cal, low-carb, high fiber, unsweetened, loaf of nuts and barriers. Okay?
They will accept it with smiles, wait for you to leave, and then force the new
guy to try it. When he rejects it will go in the trash.
Next time I’ll cover more strategies for finding
your guy.
Monday, April 16, 2012
How to date a Firefighter cont.
Let me continue.
3)If you
continue to date you need to once again educate yourself on his work place.
Calling and texting are not cool during what you could call business hours 9-5.
We are working then, drilling, training, inspecting, and running calls.
Too much
time on the phone could even lead your guy into some office time with his
officer, so let him set the pace on this. If you text that you want to say hi
and he doesn’t get back to you in your timeframe tough, he’s at work, he could
be on a call or at drill. Sending another message in five minutes or ten
minutes or half an hour isn’t going to score you any points. Lunch time is when
we get lunch, it isn’t noon, same thing with dinner, we eat when we can, not by
the clock.
If you want
the work schedule of a businessman, date a businessman not a fireman. This
brings up another good point, we work off a set calendar, most firefighters can
tell you if given a few minutes if they will be working on Christmas day three
years from now. Okay we work holidays, weekends, anniversaries, birthdays, and
overtime.
If your man
not being able to get off for some special day is a problem for you, oh well,
deal with it. We work shifts and we can give you your very own personal copy of
a shift calendar to help you keep track, just ask.
There is
another phenomenon with firefighters called trades. A trade, at least for us is
a really cool work privilege. Trades are the ability for us to get off of work
by having another qualified firefighter come in and work for us. The department
doesn’t care who is on the truck as long as the required number of personnel are.
So if a
special need arises for us to get off work we can call one of our buddies on
another shift and have them cover for us for a whole shift or a few hours.
The downside
of trading is when it is time for payback your guy needs to go to work for his
friend on a day he would normally have off. The point here is there is a great
deal of flexibility in our work schedule but it has a downside of sometimes we
just can’t get out of work for your special occasion. We also use this as a way
to escape your requests sometimes.
“Oh sorry
baby I’d love to meet your book club buddies but I have to pay this trade back.”
4)Guys will
have a different personality at the fire station, just understand it has
nothing to do with you. It’s all about his social standing within his crew. If
you in anyway detract from his maleness, his feeling of being a man among men,
you will suffer.
So if you
sense he is a little standoffish when you come to visit, just be cool with it,
don’t call attention to it. Don’t get your nose out of joint about it and don’t
give him grief about it later either. Firefighting is a tough game and showing
weakness around anyone over the age of six places doubt in the minds of others.
Showing up unexpectedly
can be especially bad. You have no idea of what his crew is doing that day and
if you show up when some particularly mundane work assignment is going on like
mowing the lawn, or stripping and waxing floors is happening, your guy will be
allowed to visit with you but he will pay a price.
Firefighters
always honor the visits of friends and family of co-workers we welcome it and
enjoy meeting the people that are important to our friends and because the
firehouse is such a unique workplace it feels like a house, firefighters don’t
have cubicles.
When you
show up and he disengages from the work going on he is viewed as using you as a
chance to get out of work. This happens because the chronically lazy
firefighter does this in real life. When he discovers upon arriving at work
that we are going to be stripping and waxing the apparatus floor for the day,
will slip out call his wife or girlfriend and ask them to stop by the station. Then
when you show up he uses that as an excuse to stop working.
No matter
how tempting it feels to just pop by the station and say hi, don’t do it. Also,
and I have seen this one firsthand, your hero might be serial dating. It’s
really uncomfortable for the crew to watch I guy introduce his girlfriends to
each other.
5)Don’t
chase, period. These are almost all alpha males, once again it’s why you want
one in the first place. So chasing will have the opposite effect, he’ll start
dodging you. Let him chase, it’s in his DNA.
Most of us
are acquainted with females that want a pet firefighter and we aren’t opposed
to that fact for the most part. What we are familiar with is the overly aggressive/possessive
chick. The ones that claim ownership way too early in the process, and we
notice you quickly and we run away even more quickly from you.
Experienced
women should already know this tactic but you guys seem to have an odd mental
blank spot when it comes to us. The thrill of having your man in blue overrides
your normal skill set and you become anxious. Take a breath and remember you
are still dealing with a man, a high bread man a manly man, but at the same
time an even more base male than usual.
Taking a
bath in a high testosterone environment day in and day out causes these men to
function at a level much closer to their primal ancestors then to the executives
that control them. A whiff of perfume and the exposure of the correct amount
and type of flesh is enough, to dilate their pupils and accelerate their
heartbeat. Relax let them come to you.
More tips
in the next post.
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