Friday, April 5, 2013

Movoto Real Estate Thinks Colorado Springs Sucks.

So a Real Estate company based out of California says that my home town of Colorado Springs, CO is the second worst dressed city in America. How do you like that? The company Movoto  http://www.movoto.com/property/co/colorado-springs/p_2.html has a boat load of listings in Colorado Springs for sale, in my mind it would seem like bad business some how to belittle not only Colorado Springs but nine other cities for what is deemed by the rich and beautiful of Caliland to be ugly cities. Here is their list.

1. Wichita, KS
2. Colorado Springs, CO
3. El Paso, TX
4. Jacksonville, FL
5. Louisville, KY
6. Tulsa, OK
7. Albuquerque, NM
8. San Antonio, TX
9. Milwaukee, WI
10.Indianapolis, IN


You can find listings in all of these cities on the web site for Movoto. This company has determined that all these communities are fashion nightmares, and says that the only safe place for the well dressed is on a coast and that fly over country should be avoided at all costs as some our ugly might rub off on you.

We made another shameful list of theirs, we were rated as one of the 10 safest cities in America. So in California it is more important that you be well dressed when you are raped, robed, murdered and buried, in other words they would prefer to be caught dead in expensive clothes than cheap ones. I understand the feeling, who would want to be violently assaulted in thrift store clothing? We all no how poorly hand me downs hold up to knife and gun attacks. 

You see in a superficial city like LA it is never about the quality of a persons soul that counts, it is how you look. When the depth of your average conversation goes no further than the clothing you wear why would you ever want to know anything real about your friends, co-workers, and neighbors? All that really counts is "Who are you wearing?"

Seems life in California or at least at Movoto Real Estate is all centered on the red carpet that leads to their office doors. I'm sure if one of top their agents was going to drive you around to a few open houses they would pick you up in a Bentley Flying Spur, while a junior agent would probably drive you about in something awful like an Audi A8, oh the horror.

I wonder if you were poorly dressed yet still looking at multimillion dollar homes, would they refuse to show any of their inventory? Maybe Movoto has a loaner system in place, so if you do show up dressed like a peasant they can quickly have you fitted and dressed in just a few minutes, my God could you imagine if a competitor saw you showing a $10,000,000 home with someone poorly dressed simpleton, you would be laughed right out of Tiki Ti and surely shunned.


Can you imagine if when you arrived at the open house that some how one of those filthy lawn keepers didn't get the memo and had the audacity to be visible when you arrived. I'm sure if the agent spoke Spanish and not flawless French that the worker would get a good talking to, or better yet get a $900 Jimmy Choo pump up their disrespectful ass.


Yeah we dress casually in Colorado Springs especially while we breath in great Rocky Mountain air as we race down a killer single trac at break neck speed. We dress simply while we have a cup coffee at not a Starbucks or Coffee Bean and Tea, but at a locally owned coffee shop where they know your name and donate all their tips to a local charity. 

We dress poorly while skiing with our children and fly fishing on one of our thousands of miles of wild water. We dress horribly while serving in a soup kitchen, while attending church, while having a holiday meal with our many friends.

I guess we should just close up shop here in Colorado Springs out of embarrassment to America as a whole. The good news is we can reopen for business when we have enough haute couture fashion shops here to erase the stigma we have been rightly labeled with by some far away Real Estate company as the second worst dressed city in America. Oh and by the way the next time I look to purchase a new home anywhere in the USA it sure as hell won't be a listing of Movoto's. I hate to get all dressed up to spend my money.